(with apologies to Ogden Nash)

Hi, everyone! And welcome to Write-Up For Yesterday, BttP’s guide to what the heck happened yesterday in baseball. We’re not gonna just hand you some scores here, because we trust you know how to type the letters E-S-P-N into your internet machine. Instead, we hope to give you a fuller and richer understanding of important goings on from yesterday in baseball. The big stories, and the noteworthy performances-good and bad.

STORY LINES AND NEWS CYCLE EPHEMERA

Friends, I admit it: I was unsure of the power of Write-Up For Yesterday. When I provided a preview of yesterday’s intriguing pitching match-ups in the inaugural edition of this feature, I included the C.J. Wilson–James Paxton tilt mostly as a snide reference to the fact there were only eight games scheduled. Such was my folly. I am unsure whether my typing of those words enacted some type of ancient curse, or if Mr. Wilson read the piece and got real cheesed off, but I do know: BttP is entirely responsible for Wilson’s eight innings of two-hit, shutout ball that led to an Angels win. We have this power, we should endeavor to be responsible with it. Also:

That sounds so adorable. I would watch that. MAKE IT HAPPEN, MANFRED.

Pitcher and person-who-spells-his-own-name-incorrectly, Mat Latos started his first game as a Miami Loria. It did not go well! Latos did not look good at all, to the point that I felt vaguely uncomfortable watching. His pitching performance was akin to having to sit and watch the worst person in your improv class attempt Robin Williams’ shtick. Latos gave up seven runs and was only able to record two outs (one of which was on a sacrifice bunt) before getting pulled in the first. He currently has an ERA of 94.50, which is both absolutely abysmal and somehow better than you would have thought. Giancarlo Stanton had four plate appearances and walked three times. Unfortunately, Michael Morse was batting behind Stanton and he turned four plate appearances into three strikeouts. You probably do not need me to tell you this, but the Braves won.

The Tampa Rays bullpen pitched 3.1 scoreless innings against the Baltimore Orioles. Too bad that happened after Nathan Karns gave up six earned runs to the Orioles. Oh well, live and learn! Steve Pearce, trying to prove his success last year was not a fluke, has hit a homer in both of the Orioles games to this point. If he hits a home run in every gave the Orioles play this year, he will probably have a pretty good year. Don’t quote me on that! This was the type of game where each team’s run total equaled the number of hits they accumulated. We should really think of a name for that, huh.

Once again, the San Diego Padres bullpen gave up a big home run in the 8th inning, Adrian Gonzalez taking Joaquin Benoit deep to tie the game late. The Padres had a big 9th inning though, thanks to big offseason acquisition Clint Barmes (and Wil Myers, and Derek Norris), and were able to take a lead and give the ball to Craig Kimbrel in the bottom of the 9th. Kimbrel struck out the side. I assume Melvin Upton enjoyed his time on the bench, he probably read a MAD Magazine or something.

TWEETS WE LIKED

You know it’s April because I’m complaining about batting orders instead of making fun of people who complain about batting orders.

— Jason Wojciechowski (@jlwoj) April 7, 2015

.@Athletics Can you tell all of the players to dress like Jesse Hahn? Thanks in advance. pic.twitter.com/4LF3n4YWyP

— Jesse Spector (@jessespector) April 8, 2015

Jered Weaver, first start, pitches at 86+ mph: 2012: 61 2013: 42 2014: 38 2015: 1

— Jeff Sullivan (@based_ball) April 6, 2015

ARTICLES WE LIKED

Ryan Sullivan puts his scouting hat on

Dayn Perry with the history of Wrigleyville’s oldest bar

Matt Trueblood on trading Tulo

TODAY’S THREE BEST PITCHING MATCHUPS

Jacob deGrom (NYM) vs. Jordan Zimmerman (WAS) – 4:05 PT

The reigning Rookie of the Year squares off against Washington’s potential odd-man out. If the injuries in the lineup get somehow worse for the Nats soon, don’t be shocked to hear Zimmerman’s name flying around again.

R.A. Dickey (TOR) vs. Michael Pineda (SEA) – 4:05 PT

Pineda is still somewhat of an intriguing enigma after throwing just 76 innings last year. Also, it’s the first knuckleballing of the season!

Matt Shoemaker (LAA) vs. Hisashi Iwakuma (SEA)

Iwakuma is great, of course, and for the Angels to have a real shot at the division, Shoemaker is probably going to need to show his 3.04 ERA last year was no fluke.

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Enjoy the day of baseball, friends!